How to get the Most out of Online Dating

How do you open a can or sardines, or assemble a model plane or a jigsaw puzzle?

Every now and then we are confronted with such questions and instinctively we know that the only way to find out is to have them in our hands and just dig in and do it.

Getting the most of online dating is like opening a can or sardines, or completing a jigsaw puzzle. You need to be in an online dating site to know, first hand, what it feels to be member, what promise it holds for you.


Read more

The Secret Why the Love Life of Old Men Sucks

“How’s your love life?” our Far East Director (from the job I retired from), loved to ask to throw us off guard or get into our nerves.

With embarrassment, we sheepishly answered, “It’s good,” until we found an antidote. After answering him, we shoot back in hushed voices – “Better than yours.”

That was the time when love was exciting, it was magical, and it was life-giving. But if someone asks me now how my love life is, my answer would be “Dead as a fish on pond.”

It’s not that I am incapable of loving. In fact two years I go I fell in love with a 37-yr-old woman. It was as wonderful as a shooting star streaking across the dark evening sky – and lasted just as long.

These days I have closeted love in the backburner of my heart and mind since my wife died more than 8 yrs ago.

I just want to have a respite from this “love” thing. Or maybe I don’t want to assume the responsibilities that come with loving someone, or fulfilling its obligations.

About a year after my wife died, my daughter asked me to marry again. Flatly I said, “No!” Not only have I any reason to marry again, but it is next to impossible to sleep with another woman in the same bed I and my wife slept in for more than 33 years.

I don’t want to go through another period of adjustments; of asking permission to go out with the boys, or making alibis each time I come home late or a little tipsy.

With my children on their own and I am technically a bachelor, I don’t want to surrender my freedom to another woman.

It does get a little lonely sometimes. But with the proliferation of online dating sites that make having a relationship or an affair a little easier and faster, love is no longer as crucial an ingredient for a satisfying and joyful life.

Surprisingly, my attitude towards love is shared by other old men. A lot of them also find it difficult, or refuse outright, to love or fall in love.

What about you? Are you one of them? Do you find it difficult to love or fall in love?

Does your love life also suck?

An article in Mail Online, by Ms. Liz Hodgkinson where she expressed her frustration for not having met a man who is “love” quality. She does not have high regards for men she met, and stopped short of saying that they suck when it comes to “love.”

Here are some reasons to back her observation. Check them out if any or some matches your own hang-ups about love:


Why men’s love life sucks:
o  After having several failed relationships, some male seniors become discontented and disoriented not knowing where they have gone wrong, or could they ever put things right again. They agonize whether they will ever find happiness in an intimate relationship again;

o  Older men are often incapable of opening up to women, as if they have forgotten, or never knew, how to love, or to fall in love properly;

o  Because of their upbringing during their adolescent years, they are often incapable of showing affection in their latter years;

o  Older men have outdated and chauvinistic views and attitudes about love and relationships which turns off lot of modern-day women;

o  With their children grown up and on their own, they find it needless to fall in love again;

o They love to hark back to the good old days when men and women have specific roles in society. Modern-day women would not want to fall into that mold again, and it scares a lot of men;

o  Older men are afraid to engage women in an open, often personal exchange, because their feelings have been buried deep inside over the years and are unwilling to bring them out to someone they just met.

You can wallow in self-pity over these or raise your hands in protest, but rest easy because none of these are cast in stone. Even if they were, incessant drops of water will leave its mark even on the hardest granite.


How to bring the spark of love into your loveless life:
It is unthinkable to live the rest of your life without having a special someone to talk to, to confide with, go out to dinner, or on a picnic.

Somewhere out there is a woman just for you. You will meet her in due time.

Just live with the flow. Don’t fight it. That is very stressful and, in the long haul, will leave you loveless and healthless.

Keep an open mind and never turn away an opportunity to strike up a friendly and intelligent conversation with women of the same wavelength as yours. Live and enjoy the moment. Don’t speculate or let your fantasies rule over good judgment.

Love is not planned, like a trip. It is something that just happens. It is not a
dollar bill you accidentally find on the street but something you have to work on. It takes time and patience. But it is definitely worth your while.

The saying “love at first sight,” was good when you were young and didn’t know the difference between love and infatuation. Now you know better after having had so many relationships and dalliances with women over the years, (and bungled several times).

The irony is that now you are stuck at home, lonely and miserable, yet afraid to fall in love again for fear of history repeating itself.

At your age, you have nothing to lose except a bruised ego. Go out and take a risk, embark on another adventure, seek the thrill of your life, fall in love again and see where it leads to. Who knows, you may hit the jackpot this time.

How’s your love life? Please let us know and we will tell you ours.



Seniors’ Guide to Hassle Free Shopping Online

Online Shopping Senior - I Love This

Online Shopping Senior – I Love This

Since the prototype of online shopping was introduce in 1979 by Michael Aldrich, an English entrepreneur, more and more people are “leafing through their browsers” – electronic equivalent of window shopping.

Yes, in fact in 2012 two thirds of Americans, 50 yrs old and above, buy online – roughly 1/3 of the U.S.’s 193.5 million users. Read more