How to Ease Your Loneliness
I am a live-alone senior but I am never lonely.
Why? Because my mind is always exploring ideas, wandering to distant places and new technologies, and how to get people read my articles. LOL!
I never allow my mind to dwell on self-pity, disappointments over past failures and unmet expectations. Yes, I grieved deeply when my wife died but I got out of it soon before it can ruin me.
In fact, I relish my lonesome moments because by being alone, I can have clarity of mind and the motivation to achieve my purpose as a writer.
But I cannot speak for other seniors.
A study done by the University of California, San Francisco (UCSF), shows that 18% of them live alone, with 43% of them are chronically lonely.
As gloomy it may be, this part of the study isn’t so bad. The other part is. It shows that live-alone seniors have a 45% risk of premature mental and physical decline resulting in death.
Loneliness is more destructive than obesity and smoking 15 cigarettes a day.
What makes it more difficult to diagnose is that it cannot be seen as opposed to obesity and smoking. It is not a part of any medical examination questionnaire. And its symptoms are often brushed aside as signs of old age.
It means it can kill you without you even knowing it.
So if you having frequent episodes of body aches and pains, headaches, lack of energy or motivation, anxiety or depression, do something before its too late.
Kill loneliness before it kills you:
The saying, “prevention is cheaper than the cure,” is true for most things – especially loneliness.
The irony is that it doesn’t cost anything to prevent it, compared to the cost to treat its toll your body and mind.
Defining “Loneliness“ can be complex because it can be anything for different people. the simplest, however, is “an experience brought about by a dissatisfaction, in quantity or quality of your social relationships.
In short, it is not caused by any outside forces but by your own expectations; loneliness is your own creation. Therefore only you can demolish it.
1. Learn to be grateful:
Beng grateful does not only make you feel good, it is also good for your health.
It lowers blood pressure, boosts your immune system and promotes better sleep.
So be grateful for small and big things. There is no sense in wasting your time over things you have no control of.
Whatever comes your way, be grateful.
2 Stop being envious:
Envy is not one of the 7 cardinal sins for nothing.
It raises your blood pressure, heart rate, and your adrenalin. It weakens your immune system and probably induce insomnia.
And for what? It’s like accepting that you’re not good enough; that you don’t value yourself.
3. Lower your expectations of others:
Do you know why I love Craig, my Basset Hound, so much?
Because dogs are very constant, very loyal and very consistent with their affection.
Not so with people. People are unreliable and fickle. One moment they shower you with affection, the next they may flush you down the toilet.
Even children or next of kin can often make you feel so lonely and isolated.
So learn to accept them as they are, not what you expect them to be.
4. Move around:
If you find your existing social circle untenable, move and find new ones.
Go the shopping mall, parks or coffee shops where people converge and strike up a conversation with anybody willing to engage you. You may just be the person to help them ease their own burden.
Take a long drive when things are really building up inside you. I do this very often when I am about to explode.
There is a big world out there to be explored. Go out and explore it. The satisfaction you get from knowing new places and meeting new people is priceless.
5. Get busy:
Loneliness is the fruit of idleness – one fruit you won’t like.
So get busy. There are always things to do around the house. If not, demolish something so you can reconstruct it.
Take up a hobby.he fruit of idleness.
Getting away from mIt is very therapeutic get into a conversation.
Even your closest kin can often bring you emotionally down; disappoint you. They can make you turn red with anger.
If your social circle doesn’t measure up to your expectations, lower them. Or talk a walk and look for others you can relate to.